Nov 1, 2012

Run Away!

I went to bed on Friday night with the intention of rising early on Saturday to hoof it through the Undy 5000 5K I registered for a few weeks back.  That was my intention.  Instead, I caught up on some much needed sleep while my sainted husband took the kiddies.

This morning, I made up for my Saturday absence by attending my first ever run class at Positively Fit. I ran a little under 3.5 miles - and at 6am to boot. It was grueling, but it was also wonderful. I can hear you saying, "Wonderful? Right! What's so wonderful about that?" But it really was and here's why:

My life at home with Charlie (my darling Charlie who is battling tooth and nail against the effects of his cerebral palsy and epilepsy) is really shitty right now.  He is frustrated and needy and the only way he feels he can communicate with us is by squealing.  Its that same high pitched screaming piglet-style squeal that he's been doing since the beginning of September.  It sucks all of the oxygen out of the room and leaves everyone in its wake with tears and a migraine.  His screaming has me crying at every turn.  I cried through boot camp class on Monday. I spent 15 minutes in the shower on Tuesday crying into a towel. I fell apart on my Chiropractor's table today. I'm just at a complete loss. So when I went running this morning, I was able to treat myself to a cool November breeze, the soft sound of foot fall and a quiet conversation with a running partner.  My legs were killing me, but my world was quiet. For a brilliant 55 minutes, I had a little peace.






8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Dear Sarah, I adore you ;) Have been reading for a while, first time commenter, but go girl go! you can do it.

Loopy Fricken C said...

I'm so sorry to hear that Charlie is going this phase of screaming. I'm absolutely sure it will pass. It sounds like you have a good support system of doctors and therapists that can help. Thinking of you.

Chris Collinsworth said...

Stay strong, Sarah. Your life is not easy right now but, at some point, there will be a change and you will be ready. You are truly an admirable person dealing the best you can with the the situation you'be been dealt. I think of you often and wish you always - strength.

Anonymous said...

Just wanted to say you have a great site and thanks for posting!…

Jacki said...

exactly what I love about running: the quiet stillness of my mind and emotions. I crave it like nothing else.
I'm so sorry Charlie is going thru this phase. It sounds so challenging for you all. As someone who is sensitive to sound of any kind, I can empathize totally.

sweetbittertart said...

Aww, Sarah, I so feel for you. I so hope things get better soon. I don't post very often, but am so inspired by your journey, your grace, your heart, and your courage. xo

Positively Fit LH said...

Did you know that I needed that run and conversation with you as much as you did that day? I love you my friend :)

Loretta Fontaine (APPLESandRUBIES) said...

Sarah- I will be wishing you a big helping of inner peace as Thanksgiving approaches. I do hope things get better with Charlie.

Loretta